#228-A SCREAM PIERCED THE AIR

In deference to those of you who hate snakes I chose non threatening snake picture for this post.    I had another one which was a picture of S. Jackson and "Snakes on a Pane" but when my 16 year old grandson saw it he started laughing.  I asked him what was so funny and he pointed to a phrase written in the picture.  It said something like, "I hate' f-in' snakes.   I guess I had better look closer at what I choose for art from now on.

Over the years I have had a few encounters with snakes.  Unlike most women I don't run screaming for the nearest man to save me from the slithery serpents.  (No, I walk up to the nearest man to ask them what kind of snake it is.  See Snakes 1 #209 and Snakes 2 #220 if you want to see their less than manly reactions).  

I happen to like snakes.  Well, maybe like does not describe my feelings toward snakes, it is just that I don't dislike them.  In fact I find them very fascinating creatures.


This incident happened when I was teaching at a newly opened residential school for behavior disordered youths.  Students ranging from ages 14 to 16 were in my classroom all day and I taught every subject with mostly spit, air, and duct tape for materials.   Therefore, for science we went on a critter hunt on the school grounds.  The grounds were on about 10 acres and there was a small pond.  Luckily for me there were lots of frogs and FROG EGGS.  We gathered up numerous eggs and put them in an aquarium I had fixed made out of old door transoms I found in an attic of the school.  With a large pan of water in the center and landscaping around the edge it looked like a small pond.


A funny thing happened on this hunt.  One of my students yelled out, "Look, a two headed frog!"  All the other students came running, as did I.  Who wouldn't want to see a two headed frog.  As it turned out, it was my first class on sex education.  You see, the male frogs were smaller than the females and there was one tenacious little guy hanging on Ms. Frogy's back for dear life.  That day, they learned a lot I hadn't planned on.


Each day we watched the eggs develop into tadpoles.  One day I unlocked the classroom door in the morning to find the entire floor moving.  Over the weekend the tadpoles had developed enough to hop out of the aquarium and onto the floor.  When the students arrived they had a jolly good time with what was eventually called the "Great Frog Roundup" (somewhat like the frog round-up in Cannery Row.  If you haven't read it or seen it you have missed a classic).  There were frogs hopping all over the school section for days.  A few we got to kinda dissect after they were stepped on.  We learned a lot about frogs (and this was without a computer or a science book in the classroom). 

Ok, you are probably thinking, "I thought this story was about snakes."  Hold your horses there kiddo, I'm getting around to that.  The above little excerpt is a kind of foreshadow of things to come.


Later on, long after the frog fiasco, we went out to look for other critters.  This time we ran into a few snakes.  We found two small black snakes, a stub nose and three garter snakes.  We named them all (the stub nose was our favorite and we called him Charlie).  I also learned a lot from the frog lesson and made a lid for the terrarium we re-landscaped.  The students were allowed to handle the snakes and thanks to the town library we were able to get books about them.


Charlie was a neat snake.  He loved to be handled and would bend his head over until he formed a hook and would hang from your finger.  Then we would stroke him and he would quiver with delight.


Now, you have to know where this is going.  But, I will tell you anyway.  One evening the lid was left off the terrarium (who would have thunk it) and I forgot to check before I left.  The next morning I went in my classroom and started my usual routine when I noticed the terrarium was empty.  I gasped in horror as I had to jump a lot of hoops to be allowed to have the snakes after the frog debacle.  Quickly I scoured every nook and cranny of the room.  The door opened and in walked my students.  In a whisper I informed them of the problem and we devised a scheme to covertly check the other rooms in the school.  The students spread out and told anyone they encountered that they were on a scavenger hunt (and it was not shared that the only thing on that list was... snakes).



Within ten minutes of school starting a scream pierced the air.  All ten of my students converged upon the the room from which the shriek came.   When we entered the classroom the teacher was on her chair pointing to a snake that was slinking along the baseboard.  One of the students grabbed Butch and we all scurried out of the room (after swearing her to secrecy).  It didn't take long before another teacher came scurrying out of her room.  Like Ghost Busters we intervened before she could blow the whistle and Harry was captured.  We found every snake but Charlie.  The kids and I were really bummed out.


Then the weirdest thing happened.  I flopped down on a bean bag and said to the kids, "Too bad he's a snake.  If he were a dog I could just call him. Here Charlie, here Charlie."  Then one of the kids squealed and pointed, "Look."  Out from the side of a bookshelf wiggled Charlie and he headed right for us.  I scooped him up and we all gave him a welcome home stroke.  To this day I believe that Charlie came because I called him... ... ... Ok, you believe what you want...... and I will believe what I want!


By the way I taught for 4 months like that until our books finally arrived.  I called this my period of Socratic teaching.  At first I was scared to death, but it turned out to be the most fun I have ever had as a teacher.   And, all of the snakes were released back into their original environment before it got too cold for them to find a place to sleep for the winter.  

PREVIEWS OF MONDAY'S TO COME:

#229-AND THEY THOUGHT THEY WERE GOING TO GET LUCKY

kt 2/15/12

#191-MEMORY AND MONTAGE

When reading New Life (thedesertrocks) June 5th post (about remembering names) it caused me to recall a problem I had in my classsroom yearrrrrrrssss ago.

In grade school I was one of those teachers who had to make the students keep their name tags on their desks for at least the first quarter.  Then when I moved to highschool and had different students each hour I had to keep a seating chart handy.

However, I couldn't carry a seating chart around while doing direct instruction or when stopping by desks to check on understanding.  So, I am embarassed to say that  I once had a student whose name was John but, for one full school term I called him Paul.  I tried everything.   I felt so bad that I fined myself one nickle each time I called him Paul.  Prominantly placed on my desk was a fairly large bank that I would deposit the nickel.   At the end of the week I would give Paul John the money in the pot.  At the end of each quarter I would apologize for my inability to call him by his real name.  He would just looked at me, smile and said, "Ms. Taylor, it is fine with me as long as the money keeps rolling in!"        kt

While writing this I received the following GREAT pictures from a friend.  Since I couldn't find  art for this post I thought I would pass some of the cuter ones.  I, also, decided to try to add captions.

Now, Freddie, look me in the eye and tell me again where you were last night, or I'm pulling your ear off.

Hummmm, interesting place to grow flowers. Now, where's the bathroom?  I have to go.

Hold still, Tom,  I have to hold my head just right to zero in on the scent.

Hey fella,  I bit a man on the leg.  What did ya do?

Open up, I know there's food in there somewhere.  I can smell it.

Me first...No me.....Ahhhh, I'm stuck,  move...no you move... ... ...

Hey!  I lost the one you threw.  Will this one do?

Will this trick qualify me for  America's Got Talent?

Turn out the darned lights.  I'm tryin to sleep here!

 I could care less what you think, Bruzer.  I'm not getting up until you say you're sorry.
And you had better say it quickly, because you ate all my GasX.

 You never listen to me, Shadow.  I told you that there was a skunk under here.
 Hoagie, for crying out loud,  just shut up and breathe!

#178-THE MUPPET CAPER

I was a different kind of teacher.  I firmly believed (and still am) that a teacher has to retain their sense of humor when working with pre teens and teens.  In fact, I have found that humor can enhance any situation as well as defuse some (that is unless you are being chewed out by your boss....been there done that).  


The story I am relating occurred sometime during the early 90s.
I was teaching high school level learning disabled and behavior disordered youth.  I had a lot of gimmicks I used to teach them academics as well as social skills such as humor (it is surprising, but a lot of these kids did not get the idea of humor or when humor was appropriate).  At the same time I used these activities to get them to bond with me.

One of these activities was called, “The Muppet Caper.”  This was for Civics or Government class and we went through each procedure of catching and prosecuting a criminal.

After the lessons were taught and the rules (and necessary characters) were explained I set out 3 small stuffed Muppets:  Kermit, Fozzy Bear, and Animal.

First someone had to kidnap and hide one of the Muppets.  Then a witness had to come forward to report the kidnapping to the police.  The policeman had to arrest the criminal and then we had a trial. This first part took about a week.  Then came the trial (my favorite part).  I usually got permission for all of my classes to participate in the trial.

The first time I did this Kermit was snatched.  I had one of the counselors play the part of the judge.  I picked a guy I knew would go with the flow and even add to the humor of the situation.  After briefing him, he would start the trial.  One student was the defense attorney and one the prosecutor (most of the students of the Civics class had a part).  The student parts were scripted and I had 2 aides who kept the momentum going.  Then at a crucial point a surprise witness would be called.  I was that surprise witness.  In I marched dressed in green leotards, green shorts, green shirt, green gloves (with webs sewn in) green painted face, green skull cap, and flippers!  I had also stuffed a pillow down my shorts and up my shirt. 

I slepped over to the witness chair and proceeded to give my testimony even though the entire classroom was breaking up (including the counselor/judge).  I wined and cried over the loss of my son, Kermy.  While giving testimony I popped candy that looked like bugs into my mouth.  I even hopped up onto the judge’s table and pretended to catch a fly.

Needless to say this was a big hit.  The Kidnapper confessed and returned Kermy.

The next year when I did this I guess the kids passed on the information to the students in the next term as they kidnapped Animal.  I had a hard time coming up with this costume but suffice it to say it involved cutting curly hair from my black poodle.

Along with a made up face was a clown nose, halloween teeth and curly black hair  glued to my face (in the form a uni-brow).  This DID bring down the house when I ran wildly in the classroom, but, it was when I raised my arm to ask a question that everyone lost it.  I had glued a swatch of hair under each armpit (a little uncomfortable but worth it for the reaction I got).  The same counselor was the judge and his relating of my hijinks to the faculty cause me to be voted the most likely teacher to be put away in a mental institution.

However, the following term the powers that be determined that Civics would be absorbed by the government class and my students would be mainstreamed into regular education for government.  Oh, well!  I had fun while it lasted…. and so did my students.

I have only one regret....I didn't take pictures!

kt 3/2011

#169-THE DAYS OF OUR LIVES, GRADE SCHOOL STYLE

You may not realize it but,
it's a jungle out there!

In the early 80s, my second teaching assignment was in a small town not to far from where I lived.  It was a 20-minute commute through farming areas (well, everything in these parts is a commute through farm areas).  Anyway, I was a Title One (government funded) teacher and I taught remedial math and language to grades 3-7. 


CAUTION THIS PARTICULAR BLOG IS RATED PG-13 DUE TO 2 WORDS WHICH ARE INTEGRAL TO THE TELLING OF THE STORY (This is probably how the romance novelist started out.  One little peccadillo now and then WHAM!).

One afternoon the Principal called an emergency teacher’s meeting to discuss what she termed in her memo as a “grave situation.”  Now, this principal was a dear, sweet, middle aged,  grandmotherly type.  I loved her dearly.  She had a terrific sense of humor; treated students and teachers fairly and never over reacted.

We were all in the lunchroom waiting and speculating on what this “grave situation” might be when she walked in.  Her usual smiling face carried a serious expression, which quickly quieted us down.  The meeting went something like this:

Principal:       (With a serious expression she glanced around the room) Ladies and gentlemen, it has come to my attention that there is a situation that needs our immediate attention.

Teachers:       A slight murmuring, clearing of throats, and glances at one another.

Principal:       I believe the boys started it on the playground yesterday with what they called

 “Titty Twisting Tuesday,” (she didn't crack a smile).

Teachers:       Some gasps and a few giggles could be heard.  There were several smiling faces looking at their feet, ceiling, or fingernails. 

Principal:       Today, the girls responded with “Weener Whacking Wednesday,” (and she still regained her grip on her facial expression).

Teachers:        Some more gasps (we had two old prunes still teaching) but, by now most of 

                         the teachers started laughing.

Principal:       (Still wearing a stern look) People, I don’t know what is planned for tomorrow but we have to get this stopped by Friday (at this she raised her left eyebrow).

Teachers:       (The teachers knew the key to the comment started with the letter F).  The room erupted in hysterical laughter.  Tears were running down faces.  The prune sisters were all puckered up (at both ends) and our beloved leader was, also, cracking up.

Needless to say, the problem was taken care of on Teacher's Tantrum Thursday.  Friday was not a problem.  (100% true!)

kt 3/2011

#67-A TEACHER'S SWEET REWARDS

I am a retired teacher and most of my students were 9th and 10th grade boys with learning disabilities and/or behavior disorders.  They often did not want to do their work (go figure).  Normal discipline measures didn't work with these kids so I had to come up with NONTRADITIONAL ways.  For example I had a young man who was refusing to work, as usual.  It was time to try one of my new techniques.  When this student started his regular routine I simply told him, "If you do not complete your work I will sit beside you and sing!"

Well, no surprise, he still refused.  So, I began to loudly belt out a TERRIBLE rendition of a popular song at the time.  I embellished with all the theatrical arm and facial movements of an opera diva.  

This student immediately put his hands up in surrender and said, “Ok, Ms. "T", I’ll work!”

However, this is not the best part of the story.  A young man that I had been trying to coax out of his shell (for most of the year) launched himself from his desk and headed for the door.  This kid was usually overly compliant and extremely quiet ( I'll call him Bobbie).

I said, “Hey, Bobbie!  Where are you going?”

Bobbie turned and calmly replied, “Well, the fat lady sang; so class must be over!”

         [Sidebar:  I AM NOT FAT!  As my mother used to say, "Ewe's just fluffy."]

I could have responded with outrage, but no, Bobbie just proved that I was right about him.  He was a bright, funny, young man who trusted that I would not take his head off (like some teachers).  The whole class, and I, erupted in peals of laughter.

Sometimes rewards are slow in coming, and often disguised, but that makes the one you do get all the sweeter!  (See #28 for another teaching trick).

kt 2010

#50-TEENAGERS

An incident several months ago has been on my mind and prompted me to post what I used to say to parents.

"I truly believe that teenage is a DIFFICULT PERIOD OF INSANITY. Our job, as parents and teachers is to get them through it without any permanent damage!" kt

Several high school students in the area went car surfing one night.  They were riding the top of a truck cab when the predictable happened.  The driver hit a bump, and went into the ditch.  One boy was found unconscious and draped over a barbed wire fence (he broke his back).  All were seriously injured and one of the girls almost lost a leg.  They were in critical condition for a while, but they all survived.


kt 2010

#28- INTERESTING DEVELOPMENTS

"Ugly Sucker"

     I am a retired teacher of learning disabled and behavior disordered (high-school) youth.  Often it becomes necessary to come up with unorthodox methods to maintain order in the classroom.  One student, in particular, presented me with quite a challenge.

     This student was transferred into my room from a hospital facility.   They were hoping to normalize him in public education (an experiment that failed, miserably).
     This young man had learned to get attention by throwing himself on the floor and faking an epileptic seizure.  He would thrash around, drool, cry out, and generally disrupted the whole class (even those next door).

     I tried to tell the IEP team that the fits were faked, but they would not listen to me (what did I know).  They were certain he had medical issues.
     To prove my point I brought a HUGH garden spider to class from home.  You know the kind I'm referring to.  It was a black and yellow, ugly sucker that spins a humongous web.  They are usually about 5 inches in diameter and the kind of spider that causes one’s skin to crawl.
     When he came to class the next day, I covertly released the spider onto the floor not far from this student's desk.  Then I walked a short distance, jumped and yelled, “Oh my goodness, look at that horrible spider.”  I went on to say, “Good thing you didn’t have an episode today because you would have been right there beside that nasty thing."
     That student NEVER had another episode in my classroom!   Interesting! 
     I apparently CURED him.
(Incidentally, I thanked the spider for a job well done and returned to his home in my back yard with the ants (read blog #1-5 to learn about my relationship with ants).


kt 2010