#140-THURSDAY'S THERAPY (Cavorting Carpet #97)

(REMINDER: the giveaway ends on February 28th at midnight - see #117 on 2/1 for details)

I love reading people's comments.  Therefore, I have decided to pick a comment each Thursday to post.  Of course this will fall FLAT if you guys aren't making comments!  This is no longer an issue.  In fact, I have so many wonderful comments to choose from that I am having a hard time keeping up.  THANK YOU!  ALL OF YOU! 

(And yet another change.  I decided to rename this meme THURSDAY'S THERAPY because I consider this blog to be therapy for me.  It is your comments that keep me going!  Also, since I have been getting so many comments I am going to do several of the comments on a particular post.)

To #97-RUNAWAY RUG aka CAVORTING CARPET

"I HAVE A TRAVELING RUG AND IT IS MOVING SLOWLY TO THE EAST."

clenna said...

Or ...... you are really in the land of Lilliput. And those little people don't like change!! Smarten up girl!

I am smart, I have an IQ of 143 133 123 113 (ok, let's skip that part)!  Besides, if it is Lilliputians moving the rug then I am sorry to say that they have frozen to death by now because I put the rug out to sun in 15 degree weather a couple of weeks ago..

jhitomi said...

Funny rug, belongs with funny you...
wow, Corollas effect, interesting. You are an incredible font of information. So I Say!  

Mannn, I hate it when commenters make me look up words!  Phew! A synonym for font is source. I thought you meant definition (c) a receptacle for various liquids (and I gave that up years ago)! 

jhitomi said...

oops, I meant So Say I...I'll have to use that more often to get used to it.

I probably read that in one of those Elizabethan novels I was forced to read in school.

(Martha said, "Helen, I really think your sister's husband is a cad!"  "So say I," replied Helen. "But please be quiet as he is hiding under my bed!") 

Red Nomad OZ said...

Haha! There are some things in the universe that just can't be explained!!

I look forward to hearing where it ends up next!!

Red Nomad Oz
Adventures in Australia

PS Maybe it's just trying to escape??

Yep, can't explain a lot of things.  For example, I read somewhere that your toilet water (when flushed) swirls the opposite direction of mine!  However, after careful (ok, brief) research I find that something I thought of as true IS NOT!   Lets make sure!  QUICK...run to your (whatever you guys call it) and flush.  Which direction is the water swirling?  Mine swirls clockwise. 

Miss M said...

Teehee :) Wonder what it is??? 

Keep us updated ! I forever think I am losing things, my jewelry to be specific. Maybe I'm having the same problem............

Well, it's not the Lilliputians as I have talked with my "ant" (see #92) emissary and she says that neither the ants nor the Lilliputians are responsible.  I'm going with poltergeists or aliens (although mice and crows come to mind when it comes to shiny things).

The Desert Rocks said...

I think if you google thedesertrocks, you might get me.

When I googled thedesertrocks I came up with 10 pages.  That is 9 pages more than I wanted to search so I said to myself, "Well, old gal, you can't come up with something for everyone."

I did measure the rug's progress and it moves about 1/4 inch a week (that's pretty fast for a week).  Now here is a problem for everyone to figure out.  At that rate how long would it get to Australia?  Once there would it turn around and start back?  Or would it stall out in the heat over the equator?  Food for thought!

And, as I was writing this post a large red pillow slowly left the room. Nope, not Lilliputians or ants or even poltergeists...TOBY!  BRING THAT BACK HERE!.....gotta go!

FYI: I had to do this entire post over again because those darned Computer Relater Attacks by Polteguists (C.R.A.P.)spread this out over 9 pages!

THERE IS A STORY ABOUT THE TATTOO ON SATURDAY (#142) AND BEING MUGGED IS  COMMING UP ON MONDAY (#144)  kt 2/2011

#139-YIPPPPPEEEEEEE! LOOKEY WHAT I GOT!

 I PROMICE I WON'T LET IT GO TO MY HEAD, BUT I GOT ANOTHER AWARD!

Awh, Mannnnnn, this is (as I used to say in the 50s) “bitchin!”

Thank you, Eve (thedesertrocks.blogspot.com).  I have never been described as “cute” or “like a jelly donut that might squirt” but, I think I like it.  (FYI, I haven't squirted since I sneezed when I was breast feedng.)  

I have to pass this on to six other sweet blogs, post the link, a picture of the award and list four of my guilty pleasures on my blog. 

It is not as easy as it sounds as I am fortunate to know a lot of sweet people that are blogging.  I nominate the following 6 bloggers (in no particular order).

FIRST of all I just HAVE to nominate Lazarus (lgreport.blogspot.com).  Several weeks ago he took my ribbing without complaint and was as sweet as he could be. 

SECOND comes Mona (wsprsweetlyofcottages.blogspot.com)  She has a blog that invites you into her home and makes one feel warm and fuzzy.  She is a real sweetheart.  And I bet she makes GREAT cinnamon buns!

THIRD would be Chief aka Dad   (unsoundreasoning.blogspot.com)  He gets absolutely gooey sweet whenever he talks about his girls. Plus, when asked on President’s Day, he knew that George Washington’s guilty pleasure was making whiskey!

FOURTH is Janelle (thewildwestshow.blogspot.com)

She is a sweet young lady raising two girls on her own in North Dakota.  She has a lot of challenges and seems to take them all in stride.

FIFTH Irene (softvoiceofafreespirit.blogspot.com)

This is one of the sweetest little ladies I have met so far.

She lives in the Philippines and is another overcomer.  She writes about ideas like strength of character, wisdom from failure, overcoming vanity and practicing forgiveness

SIXTH (now this is a tough one because I still have several of my all time favorite bloggers

still out there to be acknowledged).  Is it permissible to share one?  I read each one of these bloggers regularly (thank goodness they all don’t post daily).  I have found something unique and interesting in each and every one. (What the heck!  I doubt that there is such a thing the blogger police that will come and arrest me if I bend the rules a little.  So, I will just give you a list):

Here guys, you'll have to share

• confessionsofaterriblemom.blogspot.com
• driftwoodramblings.blogspot.com
• embraceletsdesigns.blogspot.com
• facing50withhumour.blogspot.com
• grinandbaerit.blogspot.com
• hiccup-in-time.blogspot.com
• eliza-twaddle.blogspot.com
• lcbfsometimes.blogspot.com
• gstockwell.blogspot.com
• oklahomasmalltowngirl.blogspot.com
• professionallyinsanem.blogspot.com
• thedessertrocks.blogspot.com
• wrestlingwithretirement.com

And then there's Clenna who is my #1 follower (who I can't seem to connivence to start her own blog).

Only 4 guilty pleasures??????  That is going to be sooooo hard as I have a lot more than 4.

There are at least 10 that involve chocolate!  Ok, here goes...

1.  To me my hot fudge Sunday is not considered finished until I lick all the fudge out from the inside of the cup (even the bottom).  This has a tendency to give me a chocolate mustache, nose, and sometimes even eyebrows.

2.  Taking an afternoon nap, DAILY!

3.  Now that I am retired I can put off almost any choir I want… and I do!  I have been known to run to Walmart for new panties so I don’t have to do a load of laundry (is that too much information...).

4.  I did something daring and got a tattoo on my ankle for my 70^th birthday.  That post will be coming up soon.

5.  WOOPS, I WAS ONLY SUPPOSED TO DO FOUR.  I ALREADY BROKE THE RULES ONCE SO YOU WON'T GET TO HEAR ABOUT OTHERS... LIKE:

Woops is this another TMI?

kt 2/2011

#138-TOTALLY TUBULAR TUESDAYS (TOBYISMS)

(A reminder the giveaway ends on February 28th at midnight - see #117 on 2/1 for details)


Today I have a guest blogger and I will let him introduce himself:

Uhhhh, Hi.  My name is Totally Tubular Toby;call me Toby.   I have come up with these rules that SHE calls  TOBYISMS.  SHE thinks that SHE'S in charge, but, I'm a smart pup (see, I already know English) so, I knew I had to lay down the law right from the start (if I want this gig to work out in my favor).

First of all, anything on the floor is mine (including that upity cat!)

Chewing is in the "Puppy Bill of Rights." (Get used to it!)

Looking pitiful is all I have to do to get help 
(well, I sometimes have to add a small whimper).

TV is evil!  I WILL destroy the TV power cord because of that darned Dog Whisperer (he's a total control freek and I wanna do what I wanna do).  Also, I find the "eh-eh" and poke in the side really annoying.  

HELP!  
I am frequently held captive while SHE goes to lunch!
Isn't that about the meanest thing you have ever heard of?
Not only that, today, SHE stopped to take a picture of me in my misery!
I'm suing!  

When she yells T O B Y ! ... ...
the best thing to do is to throw myself on the floor (belly up)
and surrender immediately!  (You're smiling aren't you?  See it works!)

I WILL NOT WEAR THIS #$%! COAT!  SHE CAN'T MAKE ME!

Grab the end of a toilet paper roll, DAILY, and run like hell!  She'll yell, but don't surrended until the roll runs out.  It is worth it to watch her struggle to keep from laughing. 

(NOTE: Actually he's thinking, "What's with you!  Are you nuts?  First I get in major trouble for messing with this stuff, then you give me a wad of it so you can take a picture for your blog. I don't get it!)

 

And, finally, if it is too cold to pee outside, it doesn't make sense to waist a perfectly good rug (like this one)!

(Toby is also featured on post #131)  kt 2/2011


So I could enter a blog hop I just added the following:
1. Have any animals?  Yep...Toby and a cat named Kit  
2. Favorite animal?  Tigers 
3. If you could have any animal, what would it be?  Horse
4. Pet any weird animals?  Wierd, no.  Fun, yes (a dolphin)
5. Ever been to a drive through safari? Yes, A female lion came right up to our window.
6. What zoos have you been to, what is your favorite one? So many I can't begin to list them but the favorite by far was the San Diego Zoo.

#137-THE RELUCTANT JUROR

(A reminder the giveaway ends on February 28th at midnight - see #117 on 2/1 for details)


I actually would like to serve on a jury, however I'll bet they erased my name from the prospective jury list just after the one and only time I was called (about 5 years ago).

Robert thought, "I knew she was going to be trouble the minute she walked in the door.!"

You see, I had paid, nonrefundable tickets to visit my daughter and her family that summer.  Wouldn't you know that is when I get a summons to jury duty (and it is the only one I have ever received in my whole life).

I tried every thing I could to get someone to allow me to explain how I could be excused from serving, this time.  But, I got nowhere.  I had to show up to the first day and go through the process (which they have sense changed, probably because of me).  So, I show up two days before my departure date and sit with about 50 other potential jurors.

This was really ridiculous because there was a couple of derelicts, a compulsive knitter, and crippled guy sitting next to me who kept groaning. I complained to the bailiff for him and was told to sit down and be quiet.  I knew the drill because I used to be a courtroom clerk when I lived in California but, this was a court in a small town (and if you haven’t lived in a small town I couldn’t begin to explain it to you).  So, I took advantage of my knowledge and went into action.

When asked if we knew anyone involved with the case I raised my hand and pointed to the arresting officer and said, “Yes, he used to be a student of mine.  Such a sweet kid.  Hi, David.”  


Then I pointed to the prosecuting attorney and said, “ My son went to school with Robert, and they used to be best of friends. Hi, Robert, nice to see you again.”  Robert suddenly dropped his head and shook it from side to side.

As the morning wore on I had more opportunity to be certain I wasn’t chosen.  When they asked if there were any reason we couldn’t serve I raised my hand (Robert’s head flopped down again.  He knew there was more to come).  I told the court about my non-refundable airline tickets.  I went on to say that I wouldn’t be a very good juror if I was thinking about how much money it cost me to serve,  how I wasn’t going to get to see my grandchildren, and how I couldn’t afford another ticket.

They had a chance to excuse me and the crippled guy, but no, we ALL had to return after the lunch break.

That is when I really came to life.  Now, pay attention because this case was really stupid!   The victim had property damage to his car that was done by the accused.  WAIT FOR IT...The accused was once married to the victim’s wife.  (Here’s where it gets funny).  The accused was having a hard time, lost his job, etc. etc.  The victim and his wife (the ex) asked him (the accused) to come and live with them (are you getting this so far?).  One night (TO MY SURPRISE– yeah, right) a fight broke out at their place.  The accused got mad and took a sledge hammer to the victim’s automobile.  The police were called, charges were filed and the case was set for jury trial…tomorrow!

I couldn’t believed what I was hearing.  So when the Judge asked if there was anyone here who thought they could not render a fair and unbiased verdict Robert dropped his head even before I raised my hand.  Robert kept his head down and slowly shook it when the Judge (who apparently was slow to learn) asked me to explain why.  This is kind of what I said:

“Frankly Judge, I think this is the dumbest thing I have ever heard .  If these two people (pointing to the victims) were stupid enough to invite the EX to live with them then they should suffer the consequences of their decision.  This is a complete waist of the court’s time, my time, the tax payers money and this poor guy sitting next to me.  This should have been settled out of court and I should be home packing for my trip!” 

Every one in the potential pool either laughed, snickered, or smiled (I think they wanted to applaud).  By the way, I was released from jury duty! ( I think that my comments tainted the jury pool but the case went on without me).  I'm a baaaaaaaddddd girl.  But, NOTHING will keep me from seeing my grandchildren!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

LETS TRY THIS AGAIN.

Is this story 100% true, partly true, or a total fabrication?  

Let me know what you think when you comment.

kt2011

#136-IF WE ARE THE BODY (Casting Crowns)

PERHAPS WE DON'T SHUN OTHERS OUTWARDLY, BUT DO WE WELCOME THEM OPENLY?  MAKE IT A POINT THIS WEEK TO SEEK OUT SOMEONE TO OFFER THE HAND OF FRIENDSHIP!  ONE PERSON AT A TIME, WE CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE. kt 2/2011

#135-OH GIVE ME A HOME, ON THE DRAIN BOARD, ALONE

Sick as a dog!

In the early 60s I talked my parents into letting me go to San Jose State College in San Jose, California.  After all, I had successfully completed a complete year at a local junior college.  Of course, I had no intention of letting my parents know that  San Jose State had come in second (to Miami State) in the category of ‘PARTY COLLEGES,” on a nation wide survey.

Since I had lead a fairly sheltered life being raised by a Jr. High principal and a librarian I had know idea what I was getting myself into.   To give you a clue, I missed the first week of classes due to what the hospital called,  a dehydrated condition. 

When I arrived a week early to get settled I was delighted to find the school in PARTY MODE.  This meant that one had only arm themselves with a tall cup and walk down the street.  Every house, on every street in about a three block radius had a party going on.  Every party had an open house policy.

Not being much of a drinker, even though I was not a Puritan, I indulged to the max.

I believe I was in a constant state of inebriation from 8PM  to ????AM and I ALWAYS

wound up in the same place (you guessed it…… with my head in the toilet).

Hey, I was a college student, so I decided to be smart about this.  Did I decide to stop drinking or even slow down?   NOPE!  I decided it was so uncomfortable to be hanging over the dirty commode and came up with a scathingly brilliant plan.  I would simply lay on the counter in the kitchen, with my head hanging slightly in the sink and PUKE MY GUTS UP!

Ok, don't give me any grief.  I know this is someone under the kitchen sink.
But,  you wouldn't believe what I got when I googled
woman laying on kitchen sink drainboard.
I would have to change my blog rating to XXX! 

Hence I was given the nickname “DRAINBOARD KID.”   I am sure you will not be surprised to learn that I flunked out of that school the second semester after being on probation for the first semester! 

Oh, the lessons we learn the hard way during our misspent youth.
kt1/31/11

#133-THURSDAY'S PICK (Mary)

I love reading people's comments.  Therefore, I have decided to pick a comment each Thursday to post.  Of course this will fall FLAT if you guys aren't making comments!  This is no longer an issue.  In fact, I have so many wonderful comments to choose from that I am having a hard time keeping up.  THANK YOU!  ALL OF YOU!

Mary (my cousin) commenting on #74 (The Last Santa) said...

"Wonderful memory! If you had visited Uncle Bill and Aunt Pearl, you would have known that Uncle Bill was Santa. He wore the appropriate Santa suit, had a bag with loads of presents, and always left the house after dark. I knew Dad was Santa because I saw him every year. He took toys to disadvantaged young children in our town for his lodge. (I didn't find that out for several years.)"

It just so happens that I have a picture of Uncle Bill, Aunt Pearl, Joe and Judy (sorry Mary, I guess you hadn't arrived yet).  You could remedy this by sending me a family picture of all of you.

Uncle Bill is the one with the built in Santa padding (Duh!).

Ok, I can hear Mary now, "Gawd, KATIE, did you have to put up THAT picture?"  
So, here's a better one of Uncle Bill with my Grandpa Zack and my Granny Grace.

Yep, that my Uncle Bill and from the look of the
snow on the ground I believe it was about time
for him to make his rounds.
kt2011

#132-TRY DE-STUFFING

I don't want to disparage the ingenuity or hard work that this inventor went through to develop this product, but... ... ... ISN'T THIS WHAT I WRONG WITH OUR WORLD?


Not only do we have to have two cars in every garage (and a trailer, truck, Sea-Do, and more) but we feel the need to secure all kinds of gismos to make life easier.  


COME ON NOW!  I hope I don't offend anyone by saying, "Can't you crack and separate your own eggs?"  Is it all that hard?  I am a number one klutz; an accident waiting to happen.  Just read other posts if you don't believe me, but, I CAN CRACK AN EGG!  Sure I get a piece of the shell in the scrambled eggs, sometime (ok, usually).  I do one of two things.  I either fish it out with the pancake turner or smash it into several smaller pieces so it's not as noticeable (great source of calcium).


With one hand my grandmother could crack, separate, and dispose of the shells of a dozen eggs in (as she would say) "In the shake of a lamb's tail."  


Why do gadgets like this even whisper,  "Buy me!"  Some very enterprising person is getting rich off of items like this.  Impulsive people have drawers full of these kinds of things which they can't find (because of the sheer number) until after the need has passed.  My aunt Zelda was like that.  She had a plethora (another word I love see #44) of gimmicks and gadgets lining her drawers and spilling out of containers on her counter tops.  She had an orange peeler, a mini paper shredder (and I mean wee), a butter pad slicer, a prune pitter, and an apple corer, all neatly arranged around her air fern (which could, conveniently enough be ordered out of the same catalogue).  The above list is just a small accounting of the 50 or more items that she had laying around.  She sat in her chair with her pen, check book, and about a dozen or so of THOSE catalogues; ordering regularly.


WE NEED STUFF!  WE NEED ALL KINDS OF STUFF! AND WE NEED OUR STUFF NOW (as evidenced by the offer of speedier delivery for only $4.00 on the order sheet)!  We don't seem to be satisfied with just having the basics.  We are spoiled, wasteful, and unashamed of our gluttony for STUFF.  Ok, this probably does not apply to everyone (how many of you go by the name of Mother Theresa... I thought not).  I have been as guilty as the next person.  HOWEVER, THIS IS THE BASIS FOR ONE OF MY NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTIONS to DE-STUFF (or should it be UN-STUFF)!  Join me why don't you!

kt 2/2011

#131-TOTALLY TUBULAR TUESDAY (MY TOBY)

This blog is about my (not so new any more) puppy TOTALLY TUBULAR TOBY.  I promised to tell you why Toby, has been banned from the bathrooms in my house.  However, I can't begin to explain, in words, what this picture shows:

This little squirt has decided that toilet paper rolls are "the bomb."  One day I was in the den when I heard a funny thrumming sound.  I turned in time to see Toby sprinting though the kitchen with the end of the toilet paper roll in his mouth.  He was running like a bat out of hell,his ears were flying, and his toenails were clicking on the floor.  The unusually strong TP just reeled on out.   I hollered 'TOBY, NO!" But, he flew into the front room still clutching his prize.  By the time I caught him the entire roll had been strung throughout the kitchen and front room.  I couldn't find my camera, but as luck (if you want to call it that) would have it he did it again.  Only, this time I thought to stop the unraveling before the whole role was exhausted, grabbed my camera, and caught the little bugger making confetti out of his new toy.  While I was taking the picture he abandoned his prize and headed back into the bathroom to grab the end of what was left and he took off again.  I was not about to let him continue with his new game so I started keeping the doors shut to the bathrooms.

That worked until my grandson came by and used the restroom.  As I heard him leave I yelled from the front room, "Be sure and close..." but, before I could finish my sentence I heard the thrumming noise and then saw Toby busting around the corner headed to the front room.  I swear he was smiling!  When he saw me he screeched to an abrupt halt, then bolted to the right and into the hall.  And, there went another roll of TP.  Now, I have to keep the rolls up on the sink.  Hopefully he will out grow this game soon.  However, I notice he still checks the empty spindle frequently, then looks up at me as if to say, "killjoy!"

But that is not the end of the TP saga.  My son came by and while he was here used the restroom.  Being a nice helpful guy he took the roll from the sink and installed it on the spindle.  I didn't realize what had happened until I heard the thrummmmmmmmm  and another roll bit the dust.  Now, I have EVERYONE on full alert.  Toby is a force to be reckoned with!

Toby, helps me with a lot of things like:......

........checking for boogie men under my bed......

..........cleaning up for me while he is under there......

.........he helps me make my bed......

..........helps me get undressed..........

..........fetches my clothes..........

..........picks up the trash..........

......and would help dry the dishes if he could get that dang hand towel down.....

..........keeps me company when I'm blogging..........

..........and lets me know when it is time to stop..........

He is already well trained because he will do ANYTHING for food.  He will come when I say, "Toby, come!"  He will sit when I say, "Toby, sit!" Right now we are working on, "Toby, stay!"  See:

Awh, mannnnn, where'd he go?   "Toby, come!"

(By the way, the above is my "Runaway Rug."  See #97 to if you don't know what I am talking about). 

Next Tuesday will feature Toby and some of his TOBYISMS.

kt2011