MY V.I.P. FILE

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Saturday, February 19, 2011

#135-OH GIVE ME A HOME, ON THE DRAIN BOARD, ALONE

Sick as a dog!
In the early 60s I talked my parents into letting me go to San Jose State College in San Jose, California.  After all, I had successfully completed a complete year at a local junior college.  Of course, I had no intention of letting my parents know that  San Jose State had come in second (to Miami State) in the category of ‘PARTY COLLEGES,” on a nation wide survey.

Since I had lead a fairly sheltered life being raised by a Jr. High principal and a librarian I had know idea what I was getting myself into.   To give you a clue, I missed the first week of classes due to what the hospital called,  a dehydrated condition. 

When I arrived a week early to get settled I was delighted to find the school in PARTY MODE.  This meant that one had only arm themselves with a tall cup and walk down the street.  Every house, on every street in about a three block radius had a party going on.  Every party had an open house policy.

Not being much of a drinker, even though I was not a Puritan, I indulged to the max.
I believe I was in a constant state of inebriation from 8PM  to ????AM and I ALWAYS
wound up in the same place (you guessed it…… with my head in the toilet).

Hey, I was a college student, so I decided to be smart about this.  Did I decide to stop drinking or even slow down?   NOPE!  I decided it was so uncomfortable to be hanging over the dirty commode and came up with a scathingly brilliant plan.  I would simply lay on the counter in the kitchen, with my head hanging slightly in the sink and PUKE MY GUTS UP!


Ok, don't give me any grief.  I know this is someone under the kitchen sink.
But,  
you wouldn't believe what I got when I googled
woman laying on kitchen sink drainboard.
I would have to change my blog rating to XXX! 


Hence I was given the nickname “DRAINBOARD KID.”   I am sure you will not be surprised to learn that I flunked out of that school the second semester after being on probation for the first semester! 

Oh, the lessons we learn the hard way during our misspent youth.
kt1/31/11

6 comments:

  1. I will go out on a limb and venture that you were "in a dehydrated condition" when you devised this plan?

    The sickest I have ever been (including Thursday, as I have also recently posted about sickness) was my third day of college, when I drank half a bottle of vodka in 10 minutes. This was NOT a good plan. Luckily, I was a quick learner, and have mostly stuck to beer since then.

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  2. That is too funny! I did not do that in college. Somehow I knew better (what was wrong with you kid!). I walked around with a FULL cup of beer that I rarely sipped from. I was having too much fun watching everyone else act like idiots (did we go to the same college - did I see you there?) I swore I never wanted to be one of them!

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  3. Ah those hedonistic student days...I can only manage about two glasses now but back then there were no problems. My mother who didn't drink until she was in her twenties can drink anyone under the table now so never go head to head with her in a drinking contest. She also has never had a hangover in her life. I guess I peaked too soon..

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  4. I'm in the somewhat dubious position of needing to admit I didn't do any of the usual 'varsity stuff. It simply wasn't in my nature. Everyone else around me did and I really hated to have to be subjected to the smell of vomit, both in our res bathrooms and the gardens below our windows!

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