A while back Laila (The Untroubledkingdomoflailaknight) sent me a challenge and one of the questions I had to answer was: #5 = Have you ever thrown your panties/underwear at a rock star or other celebrity? If so, which one(s)? If not, which one(s) WOULD you throw your panties/underwear at, given the opportunity?
This was my answer:
This was my answer:
I have never thrown my underpants to anyone. However, it just so happens that I did throw my panty hose at a Matador while in Tijuana watching a bull fight. But, cerveza (beer) did play a major role in that fiasco (and I did have underpants on under the hose). This incident is on my list for a future post.
So, here is the post
I alluded to to which I alluded. (See, I do know not to end my sentences with a preposition, but it sounds so prissy.)
The summer after my senior year in high school I was asked out on a date by a very handsome and sought after young man. I was ecstatic and looking forward to the date. However, since he wanted to go to Tijuana I insisted that we double date with a friend of mine. He had a friend that would be just right so the date was made.
After the two hour drive we arrived at the border where we had to park our car and take a taxi into town. The taxi ride was part of the adventure. None of us spoke Spanish, but all we had to say was bull fight and off he went (at the speed of sound). He weaved and dodged other vehicles and sightseers. The driver appeared to be in a race with other taxi drivers to get his fares to the spectical. He took one turn on two wheels and then screeched to a stop.
In front of us was a long line of cars going up this narrow road to the place where the bull fights were held. Seeing that the only way around the traffic jam was to take a detour to the right side of the road he did just that. This meant that he had to drive on the side of the hill as there was very little shoulder on the road. With all four of us in the back seat we slid together like sardines. It was then that I realized that we probably should have stopped in town and gotten blitzed first.
Finally, after a harrowing ride we made it in one piece to the arena. The place was filled with people, most of them drunk and apparently celebrating surviving their ride to the arena.
After finding a seat fairly close to the pit we stopped a young man walking around yelling,
"CERVEZA." Immediately, our hands popped up in unison. It was a good thing that I had several cervezas under my belt before the action started. It was interesting at first, but then the bloody part started and right then I decided I was never going to another bull fight. By the time the whole thing was over I was so drunk that I was really inthralled with the Matador. So, when several women started taking off their panties and tossing them into the ring I guess it must have seemed like a good idea to me. The only problem was that I had panty hose on over my pants (thank God). So, I, not so delicately, pulled off my panty hose and tossed them into the ring. That must have been quite the sight as they kept catching on everything. I can remember having a hard time getting them off so I must have danced and gyrated quite a bit. My girl friend said loud cheers that rivaled those that the matador had received rang out during my exhibition.
|Imagine this guy with a pair of panty hose|
hanging from his nose.
The taxi driver taking us back to town drove like a little old man. He probably knew to take it easy so his cab wasn't littered with recycled cerveza.
But that's not the end of my story (what a surprise). We then had a terrific meal at a street side cafe (with bottled water of course). We did some sight seeing and walked around looking for a show to attend. I was aware of the raunchyness of some of the shows in Tijuana so I carefully reviewed the pictures on each marque posted outside of each establishment. After what seemed like ages we came to one that showed a fully dressed (gorgeous) woman only dancing, so we went in. Wanting to keep my dinner in my stomach I had stopped drinking by this time, but the guys hadn't.
We watched this beautiful woman dance for about 40 minutes. She was very good and extremely seductive. She had the most beautiful legs I have ever seen and the guys kept making all kinds of comments about what they would like to do with those legs (as you can probably imagine). I was beginning to worry about what the guys might want to do after watching such a sexy show, however, the dancer took care of that for me. Once finished, and with quite a flourish, she took a bow. (It is what happened next that took care of my worries.) She reached behind her back and undid her braw. I sat up straight and softly said, "Oh, no!" (thinking it was a strip tease after all), then to my delight HE flipped HIS bra and HIS wig off at the same time.
I roared with laughter as I knew that this was a real embarrassment to the guys who had been going on about HIM throughout the entire show. One might say it was a real downer!
PREVIEWS OF MONDAYS TO COME: